"That is why therapy is important for that reason alone, to build a relationship and develop skills and the insight you need to grow and change."
Támara Hill, M.S, NCC, CCTP, LPC, is a licensed therapist and certified trauma professional specialized in treating children and adolescents that suffer from mood disorders, trauma, and disruptive behavioural disorders. Hill strives to help clients realize and actualize their strengths in their home environments and in their relationships within the community. She aims to empower families from various walks of life gain further knowledge and rediscover authentic living. In addition to counselling, Hill is an author of two books, family consultant, Keynote speaker, and founder of Anchored Child & Family Counseling. She also runs a Youtube channel and Twitter where she posts about topics like intergenerational trauma, understanding your PTSD, and much more. When she is not counselling, she is teaming up with other organizations to speak, write, and offer training on mental health nationally and internationally.
SWY: What inspired you to become a trauma therapist?
TH: I went to college for psychology and then I started working with children and families in a developmental center. I started seeing a connection between intergenerational trauma in families. Most of the families I was working with had some history of trauma in some way. So, I thought, I should become more knowledgeable (Which led to becoming certified in trauma therapy) and get a foundation. So, it really all began from working from mental health in a general sense and then getting the skills and experience to help others.
SWY: What would you say to someone who is hesitant/concerned about starting therapy? Why do you think therapy is important for healing?
TH: When I see families come into my practice, the first thing they say to me is this call was so hard to make and I don’t think therapy can help me. So, what I would tell someone is to find someone who you can connect with, who gets you, and build a rapport with. From there you can then learn skills and build your personal insights. That is why therapy is important for that reason alone, to build a relationship and develop skills and the insight you need to grow and change. Often times people are worried about pre-conceived notions and being stigmatized for going to therapy so they run away.
SWY: What is a piece of advice you would give to a child or adolescent dealing with abuse?
TH: Not staying hidden in the family and not internalizing and thinking that this is normal, and this is how my family operates. Some kids may also think, “Why I would tell someone when I can get my family in trouble and bring in protective services?” Kids really do need to talk and open up and find someone they can do that with and talk about the abuse. It has to stop; it doesn’t have to be normalized.
"It has to stop; it doesn’t have to be normalized."
SWY: If you could say one thing to a perpetrator of abuse, what would it be?
TH: I would say to an abusive person get help because most abusers are narcissists and sociopaths and not healthy, mentally and emotionally. The only time they get help is in jail or if their loved ones push them to get help, otherwise they think it is normal. I would tell the abuser to go get some help, you need it.
SWY: You have a YouTube channel where you post lots of informative videos related to trauma recovery. What inspired you to move to an online platform, and what do you hope your viewers get out of your videos?
TH: I started a YouTube channel with 0 subscribers, and it was very hard to build it. But I realized that I should not come from a general perspective but rather focus on the people who rarely get YouTube support, and that was the trauma community. So, that’s where it all began, and I became narrower over time with my content as I realized that there was a huge trauma community that was being ignored.